The SPARK that set my PASSION on FIRE and the WIND that blew it out!


This is the story about how it all begun and how i lost control and let it “crash and burn”.

I have always been an active person and since i was 13-14 years old i have been exercising strenght training in the gym. I trained boxing for a while as well at 16 years of age and i loved it and before that i did horseriding but it was the gym that catched my interest in the end. In the beginning of my “gym carreer” i just went there for fun, when i felt like it and the gym was more of a “playground” where i explored the function of my body and my physical strenght than anything else.  Ever since i was a small kid i have had alot of fun testing my physical strenght in all kind of ways. Running, climbing trees, fighting with the boys etc.

It all took of at a higher lever when i moved up north of Sweden to a city called “Gävle” when i was 19 years old. I bought a membership in a gym called “Hälsostudion”. The members of that gym where like family. You sat down in the entrance when you arrived, had a coffee and chatted for a while before you started of your training session. A couple of those people whom trained there was competing in fitness. In bodybuilding, bodyfitness, classic bodybuilding etc.

Since i was 13 years old i had read the fitness magazine “BODY” and everytime i got a new number i was amazed by all these beautiful bodies on the pictures. The curiousity to see what i could do with my own body by strenght training grew stronger and stronger. At “Hälsostudion”, that was my first time to meet with “these bodies” in real life and i thought it was really cool. One day one of the guys asked me if i was also going to compeete in fitness one day cause according to him i really had a nice symmetry.

WOW! That was it! Me? Competing in Fitness? Building a body like that? Hell yeah! LETS DO THIS!

From that moment i started to exercise 4-5 days/week but i never got obsessed with the “goal”. Keep in mind that from that age i have also been travelling the world and been away from Sweden for months from time to time. On my travels i never exercised. I got back to my routines again when i arrived back home and not cause of the goal itself but because exercising was my passion as much as the travelling was and ive missed the gym when i was away. Exercising was always FUN!

It took me many years to build the body i have had and the body i have today. I never exercised because i wanted to compete, i did compete because i exercised. I was 26 when i did my first fitness competition (and by that time i wasnt really ready for it, i needed more muscle mass). During the second competition i was 30 years old and by that time i had what i needed and the competition went very well. So it took 10 years of serious strenght training minus all the trips around the world to create THAT beautiful BODY in the magazine ; )

When i was 24 years old i started to work as a gym instructor and 1 year later i took my Personal Trainer certificate. I worked more than full time and in 2012 i started my own company as a trainer as a side buisness to the employment i had in the gym. I realised i worked to much and struggled to survive financial. Suddenly i got the opportunity to be employed again, by one of the best trainers in the country and i thought it was an ideal situation. Getting a salary every month would take away some of my worries and i also saw it as an opportunity to learn more from one of the best.

It started of well but after a while the pressure on me got way to high cause of different reasons and the workplace didnt fullfill my expectations either. I worked there for 3 years until i had to quit cause i was totaly drained, un-happy, stressed and i had cronical pain in my neck wich turned out to be 2 “popped” discs. The gym environment made me anxious, i felt exposed among other people and i stopped training. The curiousity of the body functions and the interest to help other people where long gone.

This was the spark that set my passion on fire and the wind that blew it out!

Was it somebody elses fault? Some of the things that happened around me at that time was defenitely somebody elses fault but loosing my passion was all about me. I put to much pressure on myself by making the wrong decisions and i didnt stop in time.


In my next post under the category “Bushtraining and Inspiration” ill write about how i managed to take control over my situation and create that spark again. How i managed to start finding my way back to my biggest passion in life. How to become disciplined again after being totaly un-disciplined for many years.

I am a WARRIOR and i will always be!

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